Month 2: Is extreme behavior ever a good thing?

I've been feeling pretty good these last few weeks. I'm trying not to analyze my good feelings, but then it wouldn't be me if I weren't analyzing something, namely myself. I'm concerned though. Am I feeling good, meaning I haven't had the strong urge to shop, because I've been extremely busy? I just spent a chock filled week of "vacation" with my boyfriend and his three daughters. We were moving non-stop from one activity/ day trip/amusement park to the next. There was NO TIME for Miss F to even think about shopping. Okay, that's a bit of an exaggeration. It did cross my mind when we were strolling through the quaint streets of Provincetown, MA. That was until the girls pulled me into one of those souvenir shops that sell tchotchke type items. For me, those types of stores are a complete waste of time. I've never been a collector of trinkets. Well maybe when I was 7 years old and had a fascination with smelly stickers and Hello Kitty. Thankfully I outgrew that craze pretty quickly. In my opinion, clothes don't collect dust like a collection of porcelain turtles similar to the ones that Nanny collects or the spoons from every state in America. That store made me run outside to the bustling streets of Provincetown and gasp for fresh air. Any faint desire I had to shop was extinguished in that store!

I ask myself, am I feeling good simply because I haven't had the time to even think about shopping or could it be by golly that I've gotten over the one month hump? Yes my dear friends, its been 5 weeks now since my fashion fast started and I've stayed sober! I haven't caved! Yippee!

Even after yesterday morning when I had every excuse to buy a pair of sandals when on my morning commute my black gladiator sandal broke. I hobbled straight to the shoe maker who is conveniently located next to my office to get them fixed. I won't lie, I did walk into a store and almost bought a cheap pair of flip flops just to stop the annoying clapping noise my broken sandal was making every time I walked. And I still believe that purchase, had I made it, would have been justified. Yes, the urge to shop is barely at an audible murmur.

I wonder though, if once this fast is over, will I be able to feel balanced and at peace with shopping? Or will I slip back into feeling that heightened rush when I'm about to make a fabulous purchase? The excited feeling I get when I imagine having brunch with friends on a crisp winter's day wearing a new pair of gray suede, lace up booties?

On my wish list

Or the thrill that comes over me when I imagine transferring the contents of my summer purse into my new, rich leather "fall bag". Oh god, I feel myself slipping even as I write this!! I read somewhere that one sign of having an addiction is any behavior that is extreme. Translation into terms I can relate to- stopping shopping forever is an extreme behavior as is over shopping. So what I am striving for, as I enter into the second month of my fast, is continuing to figure out how I will best find balance when I come back to the world of shopping. I don't have the answer right now. Just the knowledge that today I feel good." One day at a time" as they say... Thank you for sharing Miss F.