Fall Saturdays- finding new ways to spend my time

The changing of the leaves, the hint of crisp air and the display of pumpkins and mums on people's doorsteps symbolizes that fall is officially here. For me, the changing of the seasons always brings about a stir of emotions and heightened excitement. It's the time of year when I take inventory of my wardrobe and make a list of the new items that I "need" for the new fashion "season". For those who know me, especially my two lovely co-workers (Miss A and Miss S) who are equally as fashion obsessed, but won't admit it, it's the changing of the seasons that really sets my fashion addictive behavior into borderline obsessive mode.

This time last year I received boat loads of deliveries to work from Zappos and Piperlime. It doesn't help that these two online shoe stores offer free shipping and free returns. My office became a mini shoe department where I closed my door and clandestinely modeled boot after boot for Miss A and Miss S who not only enabled this behavior but equally joined in for their own shoe modeling sessions in their offices. I won't lie, it was fun and added an element of excitement to our work day. However, it didn't stop at shoes. I had handbags delivered as well. And when I wasn't online shopping, I was dedicating many fall Saturdays to countless hours in the stores.

So today when I finished with my yoga class and felt the warm, sunny breeze on my body, my first inclination was to go shop. Also, I happen to be solo today. I'm staying at my boyfriend's house this weekend and while we are without the kids Mr. B is occupied with a work project. Thus, being alone plus in a new city plus Saturday with a lot of time on my hands usually equals SHOPPING! Well, not today and not for the next 4 months people! Miss F is going to feel the feelings and let them wash over her. Today, I plan on enjoying this unseasonably warm fall day and taking the opportunity to just enjoy it and be in the moment, sans shopping!...enjoy your day and call me if you're bored! :)

One day at a time,
Miss F

Week 8: HALT!

I haven't stepped foot into a mall since the start of my fashion fast. That is until last night when I had to pick up a gift for a friend's wedding shower and also felt strong enough to enter into the cosmetic area of Bloomingdales to replenish some of my makeup. I did okay spending wise. I stayed true to my fashion fast and didn't cave. I did feel a slight wave of excitement  and anxiety come over me when standing at the MAC counter and started to scan items that I really didn't need, but had the urge to buy.

You see, I've never been one to overindulge in lotions, potions and makeup. Not like my dear friend Miss S who is constantly on the hunt for the newest youth serum and anti-aging face cream that she could finance a small village with the amount that she spends yearly on products. In fact, my shower has one shampoo, one conditioner, a bar of soap and a razor. That's it.  Nope, I've never gotten the shopping bug for beauty products. Yet, last night, as I entered into the cosmetic department, knowing full well these products were full game, I started to go down a path that felt very similar to my fashion addiction.

I then remembered an acronym that was told to me by a wise friend I met during a Shoppers Anonymous group. She said that one should never engage in potentially addictive behavior when they are HUNGRY, ANGRY, LONELY or TIRED - hence the word HALT! Last night I was not only very hungry but also was feeling kind of distracted and bothered by a heavy conversation I just had with someone (which eventually got resolved, but not in the moment I was standing at the  cosmetic counters). That word saved me and also allowed me to connect to the deeper emotions that can often drive my need to shop.  I'm learning that trying to fill the sadness, anger, loneliness, (insert emotion) with a posession is always a short fix. And eventually, I wind up feeling more empty.

OK, so even with this infite wisdom that I have attained through my fashion fast I still know that the art of fashion is something that I love and appreciate. I think though, what I'm getting at, is that I'm finding a way to appreciate fashion and eventually shop in a way that's done in moderation and with attunement to my emotions. I like where I'm at right now...

One day at a time.

Miss F.

I have nothing to wear...

Is it me, or do we all have moments where we find ourselves standing in our closets, overstuffed with clothes, accessories, pashminas, shoes, jewelry, etc and feel like we have nothing to wear? It comes in spurts for me and lately I've been feeling pretty good about my wares. Until this morning, when I stood in my closet wrapped in a towel rushing to get ready for work. I was frozen and was lacking inspiration and the creativity that was needed to assemble an outfit for work. Typically, I enjoy taking the time to mix and match pieces and create a new look. However this morning, I felt like everything staring back at me was dull, boring and lifeless. It is times like these when I start to plan my next shopping spree or online search to help inject some funk and life into my wardrobe again.

Instead, due to this God-forsaken fashion fast, I can only spend time (and no money) in one place- my closet. Sometimes if I'm having a momentary lapse in creativity, I will open the nearest fashion magazine to get inspired and this will usually jump start my creative juices. Yet today I felt annoyed. I took my annoyance to a new level and gave up. I put on a  light blue serious looking Brooks Brothers button up shirt, brown pants and  flats. I decided, in that brief moment, that putting together a unique outfit wasn't a priority and really, who cares! I proceeded to grab my bags and then when I was about to leave my house,  I turned around, ran into my closet and threw on a snakeskin belt! Who was I kidding? I do care!

You see, with just a little effort, and sometimes hitting a fashion wall, I am finding that I CAN make do. I mean, what other option do I have? I'm no quitter!

One day at a time.

Miss F.

Sally's rules and Miss F's lessons learned..

The woman who founded the Great American Apparel Diet, Sally Bjornsen, which I referenced in my very first blog posting, is coming to the home stretch of her own year-long fashion fast. Yes, I said, YEAR-LONG! That is one strong woman! Now, Sally learned enough from her year-long experiment to establish eight essential shopping rules—steps, considerations, and minimum requirements that will help ward off wasteful spending.

Here are Sally's rules:


1. Don’t ever buy something because it’s on sale. Don’t buy it if you wouldn’t pay full price for it.
2. Don’t buy anything you don’t try on first.
3. Don’t buy anything that doesn’t fit you at that moment.
4. Don’t buy anything on impulse–it’s usually all wrong.
5. Don’t buy it unless you have two things in your closet that will pair nicely with it.
6. Don’t buy it if you aren’t comfortable in it right now.
7. Don’t buy it because it’s “in,” instead buy it because it’s magical!
8. Buy local if you can.

I don't have a list of 8 rules as my fashion fast is still in its infancy. Also, for those who know me, I'm not a fan of rules. I am interested in learning and have come up with some valuable lessons that I have learned thus far.

Here is the start of Miss F's lessons learned:


1- Only buy high quality clothing. If you do buy "disposable clothing" (as I like to call it), don't do it before you go on a 6 month fashion fast. You will quickly realize that low quality clothing (eg; from Target) stretches, fades, pills easily or just plain falls apart. It's high quality for me here on out!

2- Classic pieces should take up 75% of one's wardrobe. These are what I like to call anchor pieces. Solid, strong pieces that have staying power and stand the test of time through passing trends. You'll feel and look like a million bucks (think the late Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy). Below are some of my favorite CBK outfits......actually, this feels like a good place to pause and pay our respects to a classic fashion role-model.

Month 2: Is extreme behavior ever a good thing?

I've been feeling pretty good these last few weeks. I'm trying not to analyze my good feelings, but then it wouldn't be me if I weren't analyzing something, namely myself. I'm concerned though. Am I feeling good, meaning I haven't had the strong urge to shop, because I've been extremely busy? I just spent a chock filled week of "vacation" with my boyfriend and his three daughters. We were moving non-stop from one activity/ day trip/amusement park to the next. There was NO TIME for Miss F to even think about shopping. Okay, that's a bit of an exaggeration. It did cross my mind when we were strolling through the quaint streets of Provincetown, MA. That was until the girls pulled me into one of those souvenir shops that sell tchotchke type items. For me, those types of stores are a complete waste of time. I've never been a collector of trinkets. Well maybe when I was 7 years old and had a fascination with smelly stickers and Hello Kitty. Thankfully I outgrew that craze pretty quickly. In my opinion, clothes don't collect dust like a collection of porcelain turtles similar to the ones that Nanny collects or the spoons from every state in America. That store made me run outside to the bustling streets of Provincetown and gasp for fresh air. Any faint desire I had to shop was extinguished in that store!

I ask myself, am I feeling good simply because I haven't had the time to even think about shopping or could it be by golly that I've gotten over the one month hump? Yes my dear friends, its been 5 weeks now since my fashion fast started and I've stayed sober! I haven't caved! Yippee!

Even after yesterday morning when I had every excuse to buy a pair of sandals when on my morning commute my black gladiator sandal broke. I hobbled straight to the shoe maker who is conveniently located next to my office to get them fixed. I won't lie, I did walk into a store and almost bought a cheap pair of flip flops just to stop the annoying clapping noise my broken sandal was making every time I walked. And I still believe that purchase, had I made it, would have been justified. Yes, the urge to shop is barely at an audible murmur.

I wonder though, if once this fast is over, will I be able to feel balanced and at peace with shopping? Or will I slip back into feeling that heightened rush when I'm about to make a fabulous purchase? The excited feeling I get when I imagine having brunch with friends on a crisp winter's day wearing a new pair of gray suede, lace up booties?

On my wish list

Or the thrill that comes over me when I imagine transferring the contents of my summer purse into my new, rich leather "fall bag". Oh god, I feel myself slipping even as I write this!! I read somewhere that one sign of having an addiction is any behavior that is extreme. Translation into terms I can relate to- stopping shopping forever is an extreme behavior as is over shopping. So what I am striving for, as I enter into the second month of my fast, is continuing to figure out how I will best find balance when I come back to the world of shopping. I don't have the answer right now. Just the knowledge that today I feel good." One day at a time" as they say... Thank you for sharing Miss F.